Mailbox: Mini Consoles, Grand Festivals, Weekly Downloads – Nintendo Life Letters


Nintendo Life Mailbox
Image: Nintendo Life

Are we back? We’re back.

Yes, it’s time for another round of correspondents’ correspondence as we open up the Nintendo Life Mailbox.

As summer comes to an end for Northern Hemisphere dwellers, the season of all the video games is upon us — a bountiful three months when quality software is being pumped out at a prodigious rate and wallets the world over are being drained for all they’re worth. Good times. Expensive times.

Enough of the kind complaints, let’s get to your kind complaints and other monthly musings. Got something you want to get off your chest? We’re ready and waiting to read about your game-related ponderings.

Each month we’ll highlight a Star Letter, the writer of which will receive a month’s subscription to our ad-free Supporter scheme. Check out the submission guidelines at the bottom of this page.

Okay, just fetching the Master Sword letter opening and let’s crack on.

Nintendo Life Mailbox – September 2024

Switch eShop
Image: Damien McFerran / Nintendo Life

“a separate list of the junk” (***STAR LETTER***)

I am a long-time reader of the site, and for many years the Nintendo Download feature was essential for me to check out every Thursday. However, I feel this feature has become mostly a waste of time, largely because of the sheer amount of shovelware and “deluxe edition” re-releases of existing trash games like “AAA Clock” and “Call of Warfare Battlefield Duty Grand Auto Theft” keyword-stuffed nonsense.

I think what made Nintendo Download so great years ago was the time and effort the NL staff put into writing a couple of lines about each game, and including links to reviews where available. What we get now is just a list of games with straight copy-paste of each game’s description from its publisher, sometimes with grammar / spelling errors intact.

I get that the sheer number of new releases every week makes it unrealistic for NL to write an original blurb for each game. My request is that your team instead consider some basic curation: a short list of games that actually look like they might be worth playing, with a brief description of each, and then a separate list of the junk: children’s coloring apps, “simulator” games, anything published by RedDeerGames, etc.

Thank you for your kind consideration!
JJtheTexan

This is an issue we’ve struggled with for a long time now. Despite the Download’s legacy on the site, it came to a point where it was taking multiple hours to trawl through and get entries to a half-presentable state (which their publishers apparently couldn’t be bothered to do) – time which is better spent on other tasks.

Curating the list based on eShop descriptions and screenshots, though, means making a value judgement which I think is dangerous. We can all spot the AI-generated turds from the scam publishers a mile off (you may have seen my calls for help buried in the couple of downloads I’ve handled this year), but there’s a chance — a tiny, tiny chance — that Hentai Warriors 17: Pretty Girl Game Redux isn’t total bilge. We’ve all rolled our eyes at another lo-fi roguelike deckbuilder but just because there are hundreds, it doesn’t mean this one is worthless. Many games with ‘Simulator’ in the title are excellent and it’s easier than ever to shovel the diamonds out with the rough.

The games we highlight with news articles, in our weekly What Are You Playing posts, and elsewhere represent the games we believe are worth noting — our curated picks, if you will. We’ll obviously miss things (we’re a small team), but that’s why we’ve brought in features like the Games We Missed series and highlighted the crud clogging up the eShop. As for the weekly download, let’s see what Switch 2 brings. – Ed.

Xenoblade Chronicles X
Image: Zion Grassl / Nintendo Life

“greater number”

Xenoblade Chronicles X, as best I know, sold about 840,000 copies on Wii U (13.56 million units sold).

I imagine it would sell a greater number of copies on Switch (143.42 million units sold).

But it likely wouldn’t sell anywhere near the 8,884,425 number that I get if I assume that an equal percentage of Switch owners would buy the game as bought it on Wii U.

The three mainline Xenoblade Chronicles games on Switch sold (at least) an average of 2.19 million copies. If XCX sold similarly, at $59.99 per copy, it would bring in about $131,000,000. Yet Nintendo seemingly can’t make a business case for porting it over.

Just how expensive are ports to make and market? In this instance you’d have some tweaking involved, due to the lack of a Wii U GamePad. But I didn’t think they cost near $130,000,000.
Alex

While I’m sure the Xenoblades don’t run up GTA-level budgets, they can’t be cheap to make. More importantly, I think you’re underestimating the “tweaking” involved to get X running on Switch. Anything’s possible given time and money, but perhaps it was decided that Monolith’s time was better invested in something brand new.

Maybe a more powerful Switch will make a Chronicles X port a more attractive prospect. Fingers crossed. – Ed.

“looking at you, Kirby”

I’m both a fan of fighting games and Nintendo, and it pains me that I’ve never been able to get into Smash Bros. It does have me thinking, would a traditional fighting game with Nintendo characters work? Obviously not all of them would be a good fit (we’re looking at you, Kirby) but I’d enjoy it and I’m sure many others would too.
What do you think about this?
bestsellingoctopus

Pokkén works well — is that traditional enough? It’s hard to imagine, but I wouldn’t put it past Nintendo’s capabilities. I’ve never been down the Mugen hole myself, but talented people have done incredible, non-official things that suggest it could work just fine.

Marketing a non-Smash Nintendo all-star fighting game would be the hardest thing. ‘Ey, it’s like Smash! But totally, utterly different.’ – Ed.

Kirby
Lifeless eyes. Black eyes, like a doll’s eyes. — Image: Zion Grassl / Nintendo Life

“disc diameter”

Dear Nintendo Life and Fellow Readers,

As the NSO virtual library continues to grow, do you think the chances of Nintendo releasing a Mini N64 and/or GameCube are slowly diminishing? I hope not, personally… Just envision how lovely a little 8x8cm (paying homage to the disc diameter) GameCube – preferably with more than 21 preloaded games – would be!

Keep at it,
Moochy

A mini N64 would be a thing of beauty, but with NSO giving access to all the games that would be included on one, plus the NSO N64 pad, I don’t see it happening. Those mini consoles were a stop-gap sideline while the Wii U was on life support. Maybe if Switch 2 tanks we’ll get a GameCube Classic Mini. Is that a trade-off we’d take? – Ed.

“I don’t just want Jim’s opinion”

I need to know: What are you guys all picking for the Splatoon 3 Grand Festival? I don’t just want Jim’s opinion, either; I need you to hound *everyone* for an answer, whether or not they plan to participate! Personally, I am going with team Past! I love everything about it: The Squid Sisters’, their special outfits, everything the Past symbolizes, the series’ lore, and just in general I am a nostalgic person! But as I said, I want to know what you guys are picking!
Also, a message to those reading this: no matter which team you picked, we must join forces to stop the Salmonid threat in the Grand Run! For the Past, the Present, and the Future… for cephalociety!
CaleBoi25

Which one’s Marina in? That one. What say you, team? – Ed.

  • “Present – Off the Hook all the way.” – Alana
  • “Team Present for moi.” – Jim
  • “Team Future all the way.” – Ollie